gaaaaah why do I always end up liking boys?

Okay, well I know why. But why does it have to be this boy? I like him so much as a friend and I just get weird when I start to like a friend. I get all... third grade girly... sort of. I don't know. Giggly, I guess.

I don't want to fuck things up. I like him, but he's also going away for the summer and so am I. I don't want him to be tied down, especially where he's heading. Haha, I like how I'm talking as if he likes me back. He's like... two years older, already knows where he's going in life, and while not exactly down to earth, has a good head on his shoulders.

While I'm... well... Michael. I don't mean to be self deprecating. I just really get annoyed when I have a crush on someone because either I say something and get shot down or I just let those feelings die in the pit of my stomach like those Doritos I just ate.

Great job, Michael!  You win at life. 

art star [arht stahr]
noun

1.The dumb bitch who everyone hates.  They were voted 'most artistic' in their senior superlatives. They have 8,000 awards under their belt, and have no problem with sharing this information with you. They probably have a gold key from Scholastic.  They are under an extreme amount of pressure.

( sometimes I do actual art instead of taking pics of myself... no... really... I do )

Goals for Fall Quarter@SCAD

- Be social
- Find a great group a friends who will love, and support me for me. 
- Get along with roommates. 
- Meet and get to know a professor.
- Stay on top of my work.
- Be more organized! (livehacker.org)
- Keep LJ updated.
- Keep in contact with friends and family in Kansas. 
- Bug Kades about KA.
- Hang out with Kades.
- Meet cute boys.
- Find cute boy who likes me.
- Woo cute boy.
- Make and sell art. 
- Work out 3-4 days a week.
- Eat healthy.
- Get involved in theatre. 
- Experiment with different mediums.
- Join a club.
- Save money for Boston.
- Have fun.

Goals of Winter Quarter@SCAD

- Change rooms if I find amazing people who want to room with me or roommates don't work out.
- Get a job.  
- OA Interview.
- Save money.
- Work out 3-4 days a week.
- Eat healthy.
- Cute boys. 
- Boston trip. 
- Continue to keep in contact with friends and family in Kansas.
- Make stronger friendships with SCAD friends and make new friends!
- More theatre.
- Have fun.

Goals for Spring Quarter@SCAD

- Declare major.
- Live simply and organized.
- Stay on top of things.
- Keep job.
- Work out 3-4 days a week.
- Eat healthy.
- Cute boys.
- SAVE MAH MONAY
- Friends.
- Contact with Kansas people.
- Have fun.

:D

Goals for Fall Quarter@SCAD

- Be social
- Find a great group a friends who will love, and support me for me. 
- Get along with roommates. 
- Meet and get to know a professor.
- Stay on top of my work.
- Be more organized! (livehacker.org)
- Keep LJ updated.
- Keep in contact with friends and family in Kansas. 
- Bug Kades about KA.
- Hang out with Kades.
- Meet cute boys.
- Find cute boy who likes me.
- Woo cute boy.
- Make and sell art. 
- Work out 3-4 days a week.
- Eat healthy.
- Get involved in theatre. 
- Experiment with different mediums.
- Join a club.
- Save money for Boston.
- Have fun.

Goals of Winter Quarter@SCAD

- Change rooms if I find amazing people who want to room with me or roommates don't work out.
- Get a job.  
- OA Interview.
- Save money.
- Work out 3-4 days a week.
- Eat healthy.
- Cute boys. 
- Boston trip. 
- Continue to keep in contact with friends and family in Kansas.
- Make stronger friendships with SCAD friends and make new friends!
- More theatre.
- Have fun.

Goals for Spring Quarter@SCAD

- Declare major.
- Live simply and organized.
- Stay on top of things.
- Keep job.
- Work out 3-4 days a week.
- Eat healthy.
- Cute boys.
- SAVE MAH MONAY
- Friends.
- Contact with Kansas people.
- Have fun.

They're not the hardest goals in the world, but they're goals nonetheless and I intend to keep them.  ... I hope.  Yeah, I'm really trying to get into all these life hack things.

http://lifehacker.com/

Why should life be hard?  I should be enjoying it.  :)

On the topic of saving money... bleeeeh.  I hate spending money but there are so many things I WANT. 

- An iPod touch. $299
    My iPod broke when I backed up my chair in class over my bag.  CRUNCH.  Not good.  So I've been using my dinky little mini that doesn't work at all.  I missed the fucking Mac promotion by a week.  I can't even think about it. 
- Nintendo DS  Lite $129
    I've always wanted one of these! Ever since it came out, I wanted one!  When Pokemon DP came out I was sooo envious that I didn't have one.  I know everything about the games EXCEPT I've never played them!  Rahhhh!  Not okay.
- Clothes $$$$
    Self explanatory.  

So I'm probably going to be spending 500 dollars in the next week.  Should I try eBay?  Anyone have any eBay tips?  :/

Buying condoms is weird and I can't do it, dammit! I went to THREE Wal-Marts. One had self check out but OF COURSE it was closed. Ugh. I drove around for like an hour and a half.

And you know what?

Still no condoms. I need to find some balls and just go up to a cashier. But I only have enough money for condoms! So then they'll be like "OMG U R HEER 2 BY CANDUMS LAWLS!!!!!!!!111! NICEPANTS"

I was still in my work clothes, which are basically just really fancy clothes. So I was scared I as gonna get mugged or something. People like to just chill in Wal-Mart parking lots. It's fucking stupid. IT'S TWO IN THE MORNING, GO TO BED! Oh... yeah... I'm up to.

Shut up. I'M TRYING TO PREPARE MYSELF FOR INEVITABLE BUTTSEX OK? Gosh. I'm a college student trying to perform safe sex. I don't want ~*~*~TEH AIDS~*~*~ I mean, I already have ~*~*~TEH GAY~*~*~ so I don't need anymore diseases, yo.

RAH Tomorrow I'm buying some no matter what. NO MATTER WHAT. Gotta find that spine I lost, I think it's in my closet. Dammit, now I have to clean my room.

Whatever.

PS ASTROGLIDE IS BETTER THAN KY IF YOU ARE PLANNING TO DO IT UP DA BUTT. It's just a fact.

What happened?  We were so happy two days ago.  We were so happy eight hours ago. 

Three days ago, it was ten months.  How can one phone call change ten months? 

We were so happy.  What happened?

( result of good lighting outside )</div></div>